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Four years later, and I've still got it! Such as it ever was anyway. I have never been a fast or even a dedicated runner, but I have been a runner. Well, let's just say jogger.
Jogging is about the only form of aerobic exercise I enjoy doing regularly. It started when I accidentally signed up for the cross country team in middle school and stuck with it for a whole season. (I meant to sign up for track, not distance running--oops!) I've enjoyed running much more without the races. One day I ran about 9 or 10 miles up in the Shawangunk mountains, and remember feeling so full of life and strength, connected to nature, energized by accomplishment and potential, content with being alone. That is truly one of my favorite memories.
So after having two children and living daily in the chaos of caring for the wee ones, jogging feels different. Not just physically--yes, my knees could be better and I have never been so SLOW--but also mentally and emotionally. Getting out for half an hour to run by myself is precious alone time now. A good morning run has a way of setting me up for my day emotionally. The time away from the house in a different environment gives me a little perspective and allows me to gather to my thoughts. The endorphins get going, and I return to the house feeling energized, centered, ready to face a demanding 11 month old and a daydreaming 3 year old. I am better able to care for and teach the kids when I start the day with a run.
My 33-year-old self no longer sees running primarily as an accomplishment, and I think this is good for me. My life is not much about accomplishment right now and I need to learn to live with that. When I don't exactly feel like running, I even tell myself that if I don't make it very far, I can just stop at the St. Albans episcopal church courtyard and enjoy the morning quiet for a few minutes instead. That has only happened once so far, but there is something about having that as an option that is so freeing.
With all of that said about accomplishment, I did run a 5k out at the Lake Waco Wetlands a few weeks ago, and it felt great.
A "prediction run" was perfect for my current state of mind (and body!): the winner is the runner who comes closest to running his or her predicted time. So even at the back of the pack, I actually came pretty close to winning, having predicted within 30 seconds of my finishing time.
It was really just a fun family outing. We all managed to get out the door at 7am, and the kids enjoyed playing around the marshy grassland while I ran.
Eliza Jane enjoyed her backpack ride, and Ben came back with lots of bug bites from lying in the tall grass.
I had an absolutely lovely time running. I especially loved having my family there to cheer me on at the end. And I felt proud to be running again.
So after having two children and living daily in the chaos of caring for the wee ones, jogging feels different. Not just physically--yes, my knees could be better and I have never been so SLOW--but also mentally and emotionally. Getting out for half an hour to run by myself is precious alone time now. A good morning run has a way of setting me up for my day emotionally. The time away from the house in a different environment gives me a little perspective and allows me to gather to my thoughts. The endorphins get going, and I return to the house feeling energized, centered, ready to face a demanding 11 month old and a daydreaming 3 year old. I am better able to care for and teach the kids when I start the day with a run.
My 33-year-old self no longer sees running primarily as an accomplishment, and I think this is good for me. My life is not much about accomplishment right now and I need to learn to live with that. When I don't exactly feel like running, I even tell myself that if I don't make it very far, I can just stop at the St. Albans episcopal church courtyard and enjoy the morning quiet for a few minutes instead. That has only happened once so far, but there is something about having that as an option that is so freeing.
With all of that said about accomplishment, I did run a 5k out at the Lake Waco Wetlands a few weeks ago, and it felt great.
A "prediction run" was perfect for my current state of mind (and body!): the winner is the runner who comes closest to running his or her predicted time. So even at the back of the pack, I actually came pretty close to winning, having predicted within 30 seconds of my finishing time.
It was really just a fun family outing. We all managed to get out the door at 7am, and the kids enjoyed playing around the marshy grassland while I ran.
Eliza Jane enjoyed her backpack ride, and Ben came back with lots of bug bites from lying in the tall grass.
I had an absolutely lovely time running. I especially loved having my family there to cheer me on at the end. And I felt proud to be running again.
2 comments:
sounds nice! i need to start running again. congrats on your accomplishment!
:)me
Good for you! I started jogging in the mornings last year, and I'm probably even slower than you. But, like you, I do it because of how it makes me feel. And the alone time. The blissful alone time.
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