Art festival time

Maybe something representational? 

...or maybe not.  We did stay a lot cleaner
than last year.  

I was remembering her at four months old
at last year's festival.  

Now she thinks she is 3.   

Go Liza Jane!  

Oh how he loves his paper bag puppets.  

And moving on...back in the real world these reusable stickers
have had a second life this week as window stickers.  

Whole minutes of entertainment!  

And back just a little bit more...visiting
grandmommy and granddad last weekend.  

I think JB's phone has the pics with the real
horses.  E thought this one was just as great.  

Chess on the Square in Sulphur Springs.  

And back once more to Wacotown.  

Story time with brother Ben.  Reading "like a teacher."  

But I don't want to change...

A kind of beach baptism for Ben...his first dip on Cape Cod.  

We are a few weeks back from a wonderful and exhausting two week trip to Cape Cod, Rhode Island, Connecticut and New York, and so much has already changed.  JB and I have noticed that the kids seem to develop so much during vacations...or maybe we just notice it more because of the break from routine.  Either way, these kids are growing, and Benjamin, for one, does not like it.

The ocean side of the Cape.  Wilder and colder.  

Most days of our trip were marked by at least one emotional episode about the inevitability of change.  At seemingly random moments (in the car, in a restaurant, reading a book) Benjamin would get seriously distraught about change.  "I don't want things to change; I want them to stay the way they are."  "I don't want to be four. I want to always be three. I want to be one like Liza."  Someone had the brilliant idea to tell B that one of the great things about getting older was getting your adult teeth:  "I want to keep my teeth!"

Sometimes these musings sounded even darker with thoughts about getting old and death and heaven.  And sometimes quite adorable:  "I don't want Liza to grow.  I want her to be one.  I want her to be our baby forever."  And perhaps most tellingly:  "I want to go home.  I miss Waco."

With cousin Jack in the sand.  Ben liked this part of beach-going best.  

We comforted Ben about these troubles and had many a heart-to-heart talk with the boy.  But two other things also helped.  After a while we encouraged him to be in the moment (we're at the beach!) and think about those questions another time.  He liked that.  And he also seemed reassured when we told him he wouldn't look or act any differently when he turned four.  Who knows what he might have been thinking would happen on his fourth birthday!

But lest you should think Ben is too serious for his age, here are some of the other things he likes to recall (frequently) about the passage of time.
Gleefully:   "Remember that time when there was a pull-up in the washing machine?" (what a mess) 

Exultingly:  "Remember when Eliza pooped in her high chair?" 

Delightedly, but with a slightly pained expression:  "Remember when Eliza pooped out a dime?"  

I have to agree with Benjamin about Eliza Jane right now though.  I want her to be one too.  She is a fun one-year-old.  We are all delighted to watch her discover imaginary play with her baby doll, with cars and trains.  She walks around much of the day humming the tune to "Where is Thumbkin?" ("Frere Jacques") and when she is not singing, words are starting to emerge from the constant babble.  Pretty soon she won't be the only one who thinks she's saying something coherent and intelligible.

Now we are back into the school year for me (teaching at Baylor) and for the kids (Parents Day Out again) and settling back into a routine.  We've found a good groove so far of staying consistent with some major things (same school and classroom for the kids, same class and teaching times for me) and dealing and even enjoying changes.  Now that Eliza is a little older I feel like I can handle some things that just didn't happen much last year:  cleaning the house (we had someone coming to do this twice a month for the last year, but we are going to try going without), inviting people over for meals, meeting new people, thinking more deeply about the things we are doing and the commitments we have.  

How beautiful to watch her run free on the beach. 

This summer, unlike the blur of last summer, I've had the mental space to think more about the class I've been teaching for, what, three years now?  I have refreshed my approach to British Lit, and what a difference it has made. The changes have meant a lot of extra work, but the extra reading and re-vising and writing have been energizing for me, and I think the students can sense that too. In both classes the discussions have been energized by debate and very real, thoughtful questions about the texts we are reading.  I know we are only through the first two weeks of school, but I'm hopeful.  I'm hopeful about the whole year and what it will bring as we all grow and learn to love growing.

Trying to touch with just one finger...

Silly on a school bus.